Find me here
by garden lover
Summary: Cosette waits in her garden for a visitor from her past. Cosette/Éponine, canon era.


A/N: written for the Les Mis Mini fest in Tumblr. Art by boooots and catsmagicraddle can be seen here: post/89637156580/minimisfest-find-me-here-fic-by-sonatadream

"Truth is given to us in our time, in our turn."

Cosette escaped to the garden, her father's words echoing in her head. In our time... If he wasn't going to tell her anything, fine. She would find out in her own. Somehow.

Cosette sighed, rebellion fleeing her. She should be more patient, have more faith, but it was difficult. She had recognized the girl in the square that morning, and now her mind was swirling with half remembered memories, things she knew she had wanted to forget once.

That wasn't the case anymore. Her father could help, she knew, but he refused to speak and it was all very frustrating!

She sat on the little stone bench and let her gaze wander the overgrow garden, trying to find some distraction. She could do some gardening, she thought. Clear out the weeds, make a path, get the bushes under control again...

Yet, her thoughts kept returning to the girl. She remembered her name, Éponine, and she recalled the last time she had seen her, with her bonnet and her pretty dress, while Cosette shivered and-

She could almost taste the bitter jealousy that had filled her so long ago in her mouth. Cosette shook her head, trying to dispel the unwanted feelings. It was the past, it was no use to dwell in such things.

And, yet, her thoughts kept going back to Éponine. She used to be happy, but she hadn't looked happy earlier. She wondered what had happened, how she had come to Paris, why-

There was someone at the gate. That never happened. People walked past the gate, without a second look, all the time.

And now there was someone there, and Cosette almost missed it because she was lost in thought. She approached the gate carefully, half-afraid it was only her imagination, but, no, there was someone standing there.

It was Éponine.

They stared at each other in silence for a long moment. Éponine wore a frayed brown dress and an expression of defiance in her face, but maybe, just maybe, under it, she felt as unsure as Cosette did.

It was very improbable, but it helped Cosette gather the courage to approach the gate.

She didn't know what to say or what to expect, so she settled for the first thing that came to her mind. "I'm Cosette."

"I know." Éponine had crossed her arms and looked less defiant, more vulnerable. Cosette longed to do something, ease whatever was worrying Éponine, make her smile.

She used to have a nice smile...

Cosette got closer to the gate, holding the bars with both hands. "And you're Éponine, aren't you?"

Éponine nodded once, curt and short, and looked away.

Cosette swallowed a million questions. All those things she had wanted to know, didn't seem as important anymore. Éponine was here and, for some reason, that was more important.

The last thing Cosette wanted was to scare her away.

"Would you like to come in?" she asked.

Éponine answered with a shrug of her shoulders. Cosette, however, was determined to not be intimidated.

She opened the gate and invited Éponine in with a gesture. The girl walked inside, barely sparing a glance to the garden before sitting down in the stone bench. Cosette sat beside her, stealing a few glances in her direction. She was at loss for words again and Éponine didn't seem to be in a hurry to start any conversation.

With a deep sigh, Cosette struggled to speak once more. "I saw you today."

Éponine hummed. Cosette couldn't tell if it was in agreement, or she just found that a stupid observation.

It was a stupid observation, Cosette knew that. But the silence wasn't any better. "How have you been?"

Éponine shrugged and didn't say anything.

Cosette sighed, feeling a bit defeated. "Éponine, why have you come here?"

Éponine tilted her head to look at Cosette. "I guess... I wanted to see if it was really you."

"Oh." Cosette looked down to hide the consternation on her face. She couldn't imagine how difficult it must have been for Éponine, to go from where she was to this. Cosette was not having an easy time wrapping her head around it herself.

She fidgeted with her nightgown before looking back at Éponine. "I'm sorry."

"What for?"

"For what happened to you. It can't have been easy..."

Éponine snorted. "I don't want your pity." She crossed her arms, adopting a more defensive posture, which startled Cosette. Obviously, she had said the wrong thing.

"It's not about that! I just- I don't know how you feel, but if there's anything I can do-"

"What can you do?" Éponine sounded bitter now. She turned towards Cosette, a hard look in her face. "Throw some money at me and make it all better?"

Cosette stared at the angry girl, shocked. She hadn't meant for things to go like this and now she had no idea how to get them to a more amenable state.

"No, of course not! I just wanted you to-" Cosette bit her tongue, unsure how to continue. Éponine had stood up and turned her back on her, clearly not interested in her explanations. Cosette crossed the distance between them and lightly laid a hand on Éponine's arm. "Please, look at me," she said, "I was so glad to find you again."

Éponine turned around and took a step back. Her face was twisted in a scowl and she struggled to find words. "You're glad?" she finally said, "What exactly are you glad about? I have no use for your glee either, you know."

"I'm not gleeful about your situation." Cosette stood up as well, willing Éponine to listen to her. "It's only that seeing you again, after all these years, I never thought that could happen."

"Thought a lot about me, then?"

Cosette hesitated a moment, but shook her head. "No, I haven't. I tried to forget. It gets easier after a while."

Éponine gazed at Cosette, her expression growing softer, until she asked, in a quiet tone, "Does it?" It was almost like a sigh.

She sat down again and Cosette went to sit beside her. They were silent again, but now Cosette didn't have the need to say anything. It was almost comfortable, in a way.

She reached out to hold Éponine's hand in hers. Éponine's hand was messy and calloused; Cosette's was pale and slender. It hadn't always been like this, had it? The thought filled Cosette with a strange mixture of sadness and nostalgia. "You were the only thing I didn't want to forget," she said, quietly, maybe to quiet for Éponine to hear.

Or not. "You're an idiot," Éponine say. She withdrew her hand and crossed her arms again.

"I liked you," Cosette riposted.

"I maintain you're an idiot," Éponine said, in a strangled tone.

Cosette touched her shoulder. "It wasn't your fault, any of it. And you were nice to me, sometimes."

Éponine shrugged Cosette's hand off her shoulder. "Lot of good that did."

Cosette wanted to argue, but Éponine was right. Maybe because it her life with the Thénardiers had been so awful, she had clung to the least awful part and build it up as not so bad in her memory.

But, still, seeing Éponine sitting dejected by her side, it made her heart break.

Cosette leaned closer to Éponine. "I meant what I said. If there's anything I could do for you, you only have to ask."

"I'll be fine on my own, don't worry."

"On your own? But your family..." Cosette trailed off, not knowing if she wanted to continue. Or if Éponine wanted her to continue. Maybe she would prefer to avoid the subject altogether.

She shook her head. "They're not gonna bother me for a while," she said.

"What happened?"

Cosette could see a small smile tugging at the corner of her mouth. "They're in jail."

Cosette gasped. "Oh, that's awful."

Éponine continued, undisturbed. "That's the risk when you follow the dishonest route. It's my fault, you know?" Éponine turned to look at Cosette, her smile sadder now. "I should have been watching for the cops, but, instead, was too busy watching you."

Cosette felt a blush spread through her cheeks. She had to look down to hide her embarrassment. Éponine's words had, for some reason, made her heart leap and now it was beating like a drum in her chest.

Suddenly, it felt like Éponine was too close. Her face was right there, her expression guarded, but friendlier than it had been at the beginning of the night. Cosette had to draw back, pulled by some instinct she couldn't understand at the moment.

Éponine, thankfully, didn't seem offended, although she stood up and turned to leave. "I should go," she said. "It's getting late."

"You don't have to! You could-" Cosette bit her lip. Éponine, she suspected, was too proud to accept any kind of charity, but it didn't feel right to let her go alone into the Parisian night.

"No, I have to." She was halfway to the gate when she turned around. "I was glad to see you too. It's good you're all fine now."

"Will you be back? Please?"

Éponine shrugged and didn't answer. She exited the gate and it was as if she had never been there to begin with.

* * *

Cosette barely slept that night. The following day wasn't much better. She picked at her food instead of eating it, was distracted when her father tried to talk to her and had to lie and fake a headache when he asked her if she wanted to go for their usual stroll in the park.

She couldn't stop thinking about Éponine. It was even worse than the day before, now that she knew she was real.

Or a very elaborate dream. But Cosette had never been one to have fantasies so elaborate that became indistinguishable from reality.

No, Éponine was real. She had been there in the garden. And then she had left, leaving Cosette confused and torn between wanting to see her again or ignore that evening had happened. Surely, no conversation was worth all this trouble!

Except, it was. Oh, it really, really was.

Cosette paced her room, after dinner. She had assured Papa she was all right, he didn't need to worry, but he had still insisted she turned in early that night.

Which, to be completely honest, suited her just fine. Cosette sneaked out to the garden after hearing her Father go to his room.

She was nervous, her heart aflutter, hoping with all her might Éponine would return. She would, wouldn't she? She hadn't said anything, but that didn't mean anything.

So, Cosette hoped and waited and hoped.

And Éponine came.

She was standing in front of Cosette like an apparition, although, when Cosette held her hands, they were arm and solid.

"You came." Cosette smiled at Éponine, open and warm. She smiled back, a bit more shyly.

All of a sudden, the world tilted in its axis and Cosette felt a calm spread over her. She leaned forward and pressed her lips into Éponine's. The kiss was short and soft. It felt good. It felt right.


End file.
